To some, golf is a boring game. It is slow, tedious and monotonous. Seriously, when it all boils down, you're hitting a little white ball then chasing after it only to hit it again. Then add a tiny amount of frustration to the entree and you have something that sounds less than appealing. But golf has a lot of parallels to life and it is exactly what Watertown native Michael A. Dildjian attempts in his book.
The book is quick read (well ... not for me, sort of like me trying to hit a wood off the fairway, doesn't always go as planned). It is broken down into 18 chapters, mimicking a golf course, and each chapter/hole is concept in golf (as well as life).
Hole No. 1: Swing Your Swing
No matter how ugly your swing is, if it works for you then use it. Just do you!
Hole No. 2: Practice Doesn't Make Perfect
I mentioned in the last sentence that if you have an ugly swing, but it works don't change it. However, if it doesn't work, then you need to re-evaluate. If you're practicing the wrong things, you'll never get better. Remember doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results is the definition of insanity! Goes for all walks of life.
Hole No. 3: Confidence Is Key
What more needs to be said? If you don't believe you can do something, then more likely than not you're not going to do it. Playing in a scramble, last Tuesday, a few holes before my hole-in-one, I had to persuade my teammates to use another teammate's tee shot. The tee shot was well shorter than mine and some of the others, but we needed to use another tee shot of her's and plus it was in the fairway (mine was in the rough under a tree). I say "let's use this one, we all hit and I know I can get it down to the green from here." Well my shot didn't get down to the green, but we as a team still made par. It was the confidence that I had to be able to hit the shot I wanted to hit.
Hole No. 4: Mind Games
Don't think, just do! When you're playing your best golf, you're really not even conscious of it. You don't know how well you're playing, you just know you in the "flow." That's what flow is. You don't have to think. It actually works in all sports. Say there's this pitcher, let's call it the Red Sox bullpen. No pitcher that comes out of that 'pen can seemingly get out of his own way. He's in his own head and on top that he's taking forever. He has to be pulled from the game, not because he's tired but because the outfielders are. What I'm getting at is, when you're just playing and not thinking, you play so much better.
Hole No. 5: Re:Vision
If you can visualize the shot you want to hit, there is more likely you'll hit the shot. And it goes for anything in life. Before I write any blog, create graphic or make a video, I know exactly what I want it to look like. Just as the song says "didn't have a dime, but I always had a vision."
Hole No. 6: The Moment of Impact
Live in the moment. There is a short story the winningest coach in college hockey, BC men's ice hockey coach Jerry York likes to read to his players every December titled "The Precious Present." It's about living in the moment. The now. Coach York has a rule, the 24-hour rule. If something good (or bad) happens to you, you have 24 hours to feel however you want, but then after those hours are up it is time to move on. We can learn a lot from Coach York in all walks of life, not just hockey.
Hole No. 7: Play It As It Lies
As a former collegiate golfer with three conference titles under her belt, one thing we heard from Coach was to take it "one shot at a time." Off the tee, you strike the ball well, making the best contact you've made all day, but the ball hits a sprinkler head and takes a massive bounce left, next to a tree - and I mean RIGHT next to the tree where you barely have swing. What are you going to do?
Well, this scenario actually happened to me. I found my ball abutting a big oak tree. Being a right-handed golfer, I didn't really have a full swing. BUT I did realize, if I played the ball off my back foot and took a six iron, then I could punch the ball back out to the fairway and have a 100-yard shot into the green. I did just that and still made par.
Lesson of this story is: you can only hit one shot at time. Instead of trying to get it all back with one swing, take baby steps. Don't try to hit the grand slam. Go for the opposite field single to plate the runners on second and third.
Hole No. 8: Grinding and Thriving
This was a great chapter! It took Rory McIlroy 522 professional rounds to register his first hole-in-one. Sounds vaguely familiar. I'm the better golfer in the family, but there had always been the running joke about me having zero. It was funny because every time it was brought up, I would go get the two club championship trophies I have. I can no longer say I don't have a hole-in-one because I was lucky enough to record my first one last Tuesday on the 12th hole at Oakley. (It only took me 22 years - not sure how many rounds that would be!)
Hole No. 9: Lost and Found
There is comes a time when things don't go your way. You're not going to have your A-game every time you tee up the ball, just like every day isn't going to be perfect, but that's why you have to keep grinding and to have F.A.I.T.H (Fostering Awareness In The Heart). Intense pain and struggle, bring the greatest growth.
Hole No. 10: Timing Is Everything
When everything is going right you know it. It feels effortless and easy. Everything is clicking.
Hole No. 11: Body of Work
There are no more John Daly's out there on the PGA Tour. Professional golfers are zeroed into both their physical and mental health and nutrition. They may not all be on the TB12 diet, but they are all fit.
Hole No. 12: Jerk. Off
We all can be a jerk at times. It is easy. But in golf, like in life, the people who come out on top are the ones who are genuinely the good guys. Picking up someone's clubs across the green as you're walking off or offering to take the cart around, those little things go along way. Remember "Little Drops Make Big Drops."
Hole No. 13: Integri-tee
Mistakes are inevitable, but the key thing is to own up to them and address them as quick as possible and move on. Golf is a game of integrity, you call the faults on yourself. If you're walking off the green and your opponent says you had a four, but you really know it was a five then you say it. You could easily take the better score, but would you feel right? No of course not. That's what living with integrity is.
Hole No. 14: Inclusivi-tee
I've always been the type of person that likes to include everyone, so last year when it became evident that someone was looking to play golf and didn't have a game, I left the group I was in to play with that person. It was the right thing to do. Making sure everyone feels included because at some point we have all felt excluded. And after this, anytime I heard/saw the word "inclusive" it became a running joke between me and a friend.
Hole No. 15: Not So Great Expectations
You walk off the 15th green with a par and all of sudden you realize, "hey I'm playing pretty well here. I'm only two over. If I just par the next three holes I will finish with my best back nine score." And boom, now you're struggling to make six footers for par, and end up with three straight bogeys (or worse).
I can't say this hasn't happened to me. It happened to me at least twice over the my collegiate playing days. One of those days was the second day of the conference tournament my senior year, I was playing really well on the front nine, three-over, 39, then the back nine happened and I end up shooting a 92 (you can do the the math to figure out what I shot on the back). Another time, was my sophomore year at Rutgers. I was playing real well on the second day, 35 through eight holes, then ninth hole happened. Couple errant shots and I was putting a 10 down on the scorecard.
Moral of the story is: don't scoreboard watch. Take it one shot at a time.
Hole No. 16: Critics Choice
In golf and in life, you can't care what people think of you. Some people are going to love you, some people are going to hate you and you have to be "ok" with it. If you like a certain band, but all your friends think that band is stupid, are you really going to stop listening to that band? Of course not. It goes back to just be you. "Swing your swing."
Hole No. 17: Lesson ... The Pain
Another concept I've heard more times than I can count. Coach always preached to us to "minimize the damage." "A six is always better than a seven, a seven's better than an eight, an eight is better than a nine," he would always say. It stuck and it is still something I take with me when I'm out on the course today. Thanks, Coach!
Hole No. 18: Enjoy The Journey
This is something I heard a lot at Harvard with coaches telling their players. And it stuck. It's not about the end result. Yes we all want to win conference title or even a national title, but it is actually the road to getting there we remember. It is important to focus on the process, not the outcome. When you focus on the process, the outcome you want will come.
