Book of the Week: "The Seed" by Jon Gordon

Another Jon Gordon book? Really? I know what you're thinking do I read anything else? Well, yes I do, but Jon's a really good story teller with a great message of remaining positive through difficult situations. Many of his books are quick reads, but they never fail to disappoint and "The Seed" was no different.

We've all found ourselves at a crossroads at work when sometimes that work you are doing is seems to be repetitive and you've lost your "why." Well that is the situation that Josh found himself in when his boss gave him an ultimatum, take two weeks off and when he comes back he should have a decision if he wants to return or move forward.

The book is a reminder how we, as humans, have the tendency to be looking ahead of our current circumstances. Whether it is looking forward towards the future or backwards at the past, happiness will always be evasive. But when you live in the moment, the present, you will always find happiness in your life and work.

When Josh returned to work, eventually under a new moniker - Joshua - as well as promotion, he lived by three principles: 1. never being too busy to help a fellow team member; 2. being the hardest working person on his team; 3. writing and singing words of encouragement to increase team morale.

Every single person has a role to play at work and feel valued for their role. It is what makes a winning team. It is also something, the past few months at Harvard, I've tried to model. Whenever a fellow colleague needed assistance, whether it was at a game or soliciting help for a game, I want to help in any way possible. Most of the time it led to a collaboration of figuring out a workable solution so everyone was as happy as possible.

It is why I had no qualms about working a "triple-header" of two lacrosse matches and a basketball game on what turned out to be the final college game of the spring 2020. It was a long day, but I knew our women's lacrosse contact was appreciative of the assistance, so he could prepare for his men's hockey quarterfinal game later that evening and our men's lacrosse contact, who was with women's basketball.

Once you find out what your role, and it takes awhile to figure out what it is and your role can change, it truly does give you a sense of purpose. 

Book of the Week: "Drive" by Daniel H. Pink

While reading this book I was reminded of the the pilot episode of House M.D where Dr. House was having a conversation with his supervisor, Dr. Cuddy. Cuddy wanted House to do his required hours in the hospital clinic, but Dr. House quipped back quoting the famous Rolling Stones song "as the philosopher Jagger once said, 'you can't always get what you want.'"

Of course as any boss would be, Cuddy was stunned and taken aback, but found retribution later in the episode after looking up this "Philosopher Jagger." If you're unfamiliar with the Rolling Stone song, right after the third line of "you can't always get what you want," is "but if you try sometimes, you get what you need."

Well what does this random House quote have to do with anything from the book "Drive?" Simple. It's about motivation.

You do eventually get what you want. In the House-Cuddy example, Cuddy wanted to House to do what was required of his job and work clinic hours - she got what she wanted. She just had to figure out HOW to get it. That was her motivation. And motivation is everything.

Motivation is what drives us to do what we do and act how we act. If we want something so badly enough, we will eventually get it. It is also what, in the work world, is the toughest for managers.

It used to be simple, managers and supervisors would dangle a carrot on string (something of value to employee, usually money or a promotion) and the employee would do the job. That is what Daniel Pink describes in the book as Motivation 2.0. It is based on the idea of compliance.

But, today, motivation has shifted. As humans we are not designed to be passive and compliant, but to be active and engaged. We are curious beings and we seek out flow (a state of being where our challenges match our skill sets) in our every day lives.

I'm reminded of a scenario, earlier this year at the Ivy League men's swimming and diving championships. We were between sessions on the final day of the championships. It had been long four days for everyone involved, but as the final night of the championship was approaching, a swimmer was standing at the edge of the pool, by the same lane the Ivy logo was in at the bottom of the pool. Our multimedia crew saw this too and with excitement in his eyes he hustled over to computers to record an image of the swimmer swimming across the Ivy logo in the pool.

He exhibited child-like wonder, saw something he wanted, and he went after it. That is engagement.

When you are engaged in the workplace, you're going to have a much more pleasurable experience. I've worked a few different places with varying degrees of management styles and I've come to find the one's I enjoy best are those where I have the opportunity to feel like I'm being heard.

In some work environments there may be weekly team meetings and even if it's only a staff of three people, it can feel that team meeting can feel less intimate. But when there are one-on-one meetings every few weeks in addition provides the employee with the an opportunity to voice their concerns, desires and if he/she is feeling over- or under-whelmed. That is what Pink calls Motivation 3.0.

We all want that in our every day lives both professionally and personally.

Book of the Week: "Positive Dog" by Jon Gordon

There is a saying that you attract those things that you put out. It's like a boomerang. If you project negativity, the only thing that is going to come back is a negative outcome.

So looking at this, wouldn't it be wise to exert positivity? Wouldn't positivity return if that that was the case? Well that is exactly what Jon Gordon claims in the "Positive Dog."

We all have two types of dogs in us, a positive dog and a negative dog. The dog that that grows bigger and stronger is, naturally, the one we feed the most. If we constantly feeding the dog with phrases of "not good enough" or "it will never work out," then the negative dog grows, but if you constantly surround yourself with positive affirmations the positive dog becomes stronger.

It reminds me of something my college golf coach always said on the course, "identify the negative, but focus on the positive." Identifying that something is not right is ok, but then you have to move on and find the bright spots.

Keeping with the sport of golf, say you pull your tee shot far left and you know there's out-of-bounds on that side of the fairway. Not sure you're out of bounds, you hit a provisional ball. When walking off the tee box and proceeding to your ball, you notice your first ball came to rest at the base of a tree.

There's two ways to look at this scenario. If you feed the negative dog, you may say "oh great how am I going to hit this?" But the positive dog in you would look at this scenario and say "great I'm not out-of-bounds! I can punch this back out to the fair way and still have an opportunity to for par."

Which one of those two phrases sounds better in your eyes?

Definitely a book I would encourage reading this month. I mean what else are you doing the rest of this month?

Book of the Week: "The Coffee Bean" by Jon Gordon

The Coffee Bean.

It's simple book about a simple concept. And the fifth Jon Gordon book I've read in the past 13 months. The other four have been some of his best-sellers such as The Energy Bus, The No Complaining Rule, The Hard Hat, and The Shark and The Goldfish. 

Written along with former drug addict turned motivational speaker, Damon West, the pair discuss an issue of importance in today's ever connected world. 

We currently live in a world that is more connected through social media than at any other time in history. It's both a good thing and a bad thing. The good part is we can keep in touch with friends and family we may not see on an everyday basis; the bad thing is it has become increasingly negative, thus raises anxiety levels of the society. (Social media is great at doing this.) 

Using the example of a carrot, an egg and a coffee bean and each one's reaction when placed in boiling, hot water, it is analogous to our every day lives and the stressors and challenges we face. 

When you put a carrot in water, it softens. Life's "carrots," when they endure challenges they become weaker. An egg is just the opposite when it comes into contact with hot water, it hardens. The "eggs" in life become angry, resentful, and mean when encountering stress. You don't want to be either one of those. 

But what about the coffee bean? Well, the coffee bean when it comes into contact with boiling water, it transforms. It, eventually, turns into coffee. 

That's what you should be in life. Be a coffee bean. Transform to the environment, grow from the failure you have endured; don't be weakened or hardened by it. As the saying goes "life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." You can be a carrot and give up; an egg and become hard and close yourself off; or you can be the coffee bean and accept what happened and figure out your next steps. (A certain former softball coach I worked with had a term for this: #FITFO.) 

So exactly what are you? 

A carrot, an egg or a coffee bean. It's your choice. 

BOOK OF THE WEEK: "Kindness and Wonder" by Gavin Edwards

I'm back! Yes I know it's been sometime since my last "book of the week" blog, but this one is a good one. It's about the man who most of us grew up watching as toddlers before we entered formal school: Fred Rogers.

The man was an iconic when to children. As we grew older into adulthood, we began to be a little more cynical of Mister Rogers. Could there really be a guy out there who was truly that nice?

Mister Rogers saw the good in everything and everyone he encountered. Today that is almost an anomaly in our social media driven world, where a lot posted to Twitter is negative and Instagram is life's highlight reel. It always seemed as Mister Rogers was too good to be true. A unicorn.

But as many people who knew him well, Mister  Rogers was a genuine man. What you saw is what you got with him and we need this book now more than ever. When things may be getting crazy and life takes us down a different road than we imagined, we have to be able to hit the curveball. But also, most importantly, take a step back and breathe.

If any one is following on my Instagram, you would have seen that the last few days I've been posting a few short four or five word liners. Those are are from the second half of the book and are ways to live more like Mister Rogers today.

THE FIRST WAY: Be Deep and Simple
One the phrases he was most known for and that he made a song is "it's you I like." Four words. They don't mean all that much, but when put together it is deep. If you don't remember the song, I highly recommend going to YouTube and searching it. Wait ... I'll do it for you. ⬇️⬇️⬇️

In the world we live in today, many people are so fascinated with showing off all their new gadgets, cars, fancy watches, earings, job promotions, etc., well that's not what life is about. Life is about people. 

So, Life Solution No. 1: When you're feeling down or stuck turn this song on, it will help. 

THE SECOND WAY: Be Kind To Strangers

This is pretty self explanatory. We don't know what is going on in other people's lives. On the outside, he may be a great job, but at home he is struggling to be a good father to his children and husband to wife. Something as simple as a smile, or a simple "hi how are you you?" can go a long way. 

Life Solution No. 2: Do a small favor for someone, something as simple as buying them a coffee or putting money in the meter. Remember "Little Drops Make Big Drops."

THE THIRD WAY: Make Joyful Noise

You may not be where you want to be right no, but look for the good you can take from it today and bring positivity to it. 

Life Solution No. 3: Listen to an uplifting song. 

THE FOURTH WAY: Tell The Truth

Being genuine and authentic to everyone you meet. One of the things that made everyone love Mister Rogers was that he was genuinely a nice guy. (It's also why everyone loves Jerry York.) Don't talk down to people. From experience, I know how it feels to be talked down to and disrespected. It's a horrible feeling and makes you feel less valuable. 

Life Solution No. 4:  Treat everyone you meet as a human, no matter what their title may be. 

THE FIFTH WAY: Connect With Other People Every Way You Can

Don't limit yourself to just your core group of friends or co-workers. Open yourself and get to know other people. You may find you have more in common with them than you think. Trust me on this one I discovered this, this past weekend the Ivy League men's swimming and diving championships. 

Life Solution No. 5: Talk to one person at school, or work that you ordinarily wouldn't talk to. 

THE SIXTH WAY: Love Your Neighbors

A slight continuation from the fifth way and insinuates Mister Rogers belief that everyone should like everyone - no matter how different they may be. In order to do big things, grow and over come obstacles, we all need to be part of a community. 

Life Solution No. 6: Show Up and Be Part of the Community; Be A Team Player

THE SEVENTH WAY: Find The Light  In The Darkness

We're all going to go through hard times in life, but when you're going through those time it's even more important to look for the possibility of good things happening. Harvard has taught me a lot. It taught me a lot about myself as well as technical skills that I used to bring joy / happiness to others outside Ivy League institution. 

Life Solution No. 7: Be Grateful For What You Do Have'

THE EIGHTH WAY: Always See The Very Best In Other People

Mister Rogers often got parodied and spoofed by a lot of late night comedy shows such as Saturday Night Life and The Tonight Show as well as other comedians. Sometimes he was ok with it, but it still didn't change the fact that it hurt. (Similar to the "low-five." Certainly, there was no malice intended, but not how one expects to be treated as a professional.) 

Life Solution No. 8: Put Yourself In Their Shoes

THE NINTH WAY: Accept The Changing Seasons

There are very few givens in life, but one of them is that there are going to be changes. Things are going to come up and you're going to have to adapt to them. Whether it is adjusting to a new social media trend, it's raining out and you can't take your group of seven year olds to the park, or a swim event gets re-seeded, it happens. You have to be able to hit the curveball - ok well unless you're Xander Bogaerts. 

Life Solution No. 9: Go with the Flow

THE TENTH WAY: Share What You've Learned (All Your Life)

One of the things I'm best at. I have over a decade of professional experience in athletic communication, I enjoy helping others, especially the younger rising stars and molding them. There's not a lot I haven't seen in the field (aside from having a computer re-start in the middle of a volleyball set, never saw that before), so as long as I can take that knowledge and pass it along, I'm happy. 

BLOG: Dead Manager On Campus

There was the iconic image of Alex Cora walking across the overpass of the Mass Pike when he was first hired by the Red Sox in October 2017. Wearing aviator sunglasses, blue dress pants, white shirt, and a red tie with a blazer and his phone up to his ear, he was walking towards his new job inside Fenway Park with an "I'm the man" swagger.

Cora was supposed to be the savior for the Red Sox. A young Alex as supposed to come in and rejuvenate a Red Sox clubhouse that the veteran manager, John Farrell lost. The common conception after the 2017 season was Farrell was out of touch with young, upcoming Red Sox superstars and the younger, more energetic Cora would be the spark they need. And it was ... for 2018.

The managerial change worked. The Red Sox used their new energy to secure their ninth World Series in 2018 with a thrilling five-game series against the Dodgers. But after raising the banner and handing out rings on Opening Day, 2019 the partying was quickly died. The Sox performed poorly in 2019 and did not show the same life they exhibited a year prior. They were a boring team.

Red Sox nation was duped.

What we thought was "swagger" coming from Cora crossing the David Ortiz Bridge was, in 20/20 hindsight, cockiness. Cora was coming off a World Series championship with Houston and was flaunting it. But unbeknownst to everyone in baseball, Cora was hiding a secret. He was, believed to be, the mastermind behind the Astros and Red Sox use of technology to steal opponents' signs.

I for one was in a similar camp as Michael Holley when Cora first signed. Neither one us liked the hiring of Cora. While for Michael his problem was Cora's lack of managerial experience, my issue was abstract. I saw through that "swagger" he had while walking down Brookline Ave. That was not a Bill Belichick, seven rings type walk, that was the walk of a cocky, young 16-year-old who just got his driver's license and was handed the keys to a brand-new Mustang. No good can come from that.

But Sox fans loved it. Remember that image of him walking across the bridge, it quickly became a Gif that was circulating Twitter. And long-time Red Sox fanatic, moonlighting as a writer, Jared Carrabis was engrossed with Cora. In Carrabis' eyes and the eyes of many Sox fans, Cora could do no wrong and still can't.

The Red Sox will be making a mistake if they fire Alex Cora just because the Astros fired AJ Hinch: https://t.co/5M7AdWIvD0 pic.twitter.com/yFPEB1G6ND

— Jared Carrabis (@Jared_Carrabis) January 13, 2020

But I for one was not fooled by the Alex Cora mask. He made a mistake. We all make mistakes, bu this one, Alex is going to cost you. And it is going to cost you big.

BOOK OF THE WEEK: "The No Complaining Rule" by Jon Gordon

A new year and you would think this "book of the week" was done on purpose, well not quite. In 2019, I read a total of 26 books - that's pretty impressive from a person who hated reading in high school.

Over the past year I grew to love books and and reading. The last book I read in 2019 was fittingly finished on December 31 and is a great book to take into 2020. The No Complaining Rule.

Like many of Jon Gordon's books, this book too sets around a fictional story of a company facing the hardships of negativity - both inside the company and outside with bloggers. It was the task of the VP of HR, Hope, to figure out a solution to this problem. But here was the dilemma, things were not going very well for Hope in all facets of her life. Her husband had left her to raise their two kids on her own and her doctor found abnormalities in her blood work and wanted further testing done. It wasn't until the nurse at the hospital, Joyce - who is the sister of the bus driver, Joy, from The Energy Bus - pointed out her "no complaining rule."

The no complaining rule is strikingly similar to Jerry York's, 24-hour rule. At 74 years old, Coach York has lived by the 24-hour rule, both in hockey and in life. If anything bad happened, you had 24 hours to feel however you wanted to feel, but then it was time to move on. Conversely, if anything good happened, you also only had 24 hours to feel that emotion and then you had to move on. When you think about it, it's the only way to live.

Staying with the sport of the hockey. there was a part in the book that made me instinctively think back to the the 1996 third installment of The Mighty Ducks. New coach, Coach Orion, gave his team a life lesson about confidence and positivity. It's easy to be confident and stay positive when things are going your way and life is great. But it is incredibly difficult to keep that confidence and positivity when life has taken you on an alternative course.

Bad things will happen, but legendary Harvard women's basketball head coach Kathy Delaney-Smith put it best two months ago "failure is fuel for success." The failures that you experience today will eventually lead to success in the coming days.

Just keep going.