Book of the Week: "Think Like A Monk" by Jay Shetty

I've watched his videos on YouTubes and saw him appear on talk shows, such as Ellen DeGeneres. He's the British-Indian author, Jay Shetty. After graduating from university, but before he started using his soothing and calming voice to create mental health videos, Shetty spent time as a monk. Yes a REAL monk. 

Living fully as a monk turned out to not fully be for him, and returned to the more modern life of technology. He never forgot the things he learned as monk and brought them to everyone else in the modern world. 

"I'm Not What I Think I Am And I'm Not What You Think I Am; I Am 'What I Think You Think I Am'"

Sit on this early 20th Century quote from Charles H. Cooley. It certainly is puzzling, but it offers a glimpse into our identity and how we want people to see and think of us. We are all playing a role in the different aspects of our lives that we can never truly be our authentic self - but there really is nothing wrong with that. There are times we have to play a certain role and we need to be accept it.  

It leads into the next topic of being your own best friend. No one person can make you happy. Your happiness is your responsibility. You can't put that on any one person, it's not fair to them and it's not fair to you. You have to almost look at yourself from the outside and think about yourself as though you're helping a friend that you care about and do the things you would suggest to them. When you learn to become your own best friend, you realize nothing else matters. 

Be Like Salt

To those who are food connoisseurs and really enjoy all their meals down to every last bite. Yes there are people like that - I'm not one of them - but these people can tell if a meal is perfect or is lacking enough seasoning. Salt is one of the things food connoisseurs find a dish is either lacking or too much. It takes the blame for why a dish is not good, but when a dish is good no one notices. No says "this is excellent, it must have just the right amount of salt." 

Many things in life are like salt, it's not noticed until you don't have it any more. In current times, the ability for a quick conversation with a colleague or a friend is a perfect example. Six months ago this was never a problem. If you had a question, you could always go down the hall or pop into their office, but we don't have that right now. The coronavirus pandemic had stripped away that ability, for safety concerns. Professionally, athletic communications plays the role of salt in a university athletic department. You don't realize how valuable those professionals are until they aren't there. 

"Coldness Is A State of Mind" 

This phrase was said in jest three years ago before a long day at the Harvard athletic complex. It also happened to be one of the coldest days in the fall with temperatures dropping to under 40 degrees. When the day begin we were discussing how cold it was and I chime in with "coldness is a state of mind," an attempt to convince myself it was not terribly, terribly, terribly cold. But it is the case.

We have to convince our "monkey mind" of things. Your thoughts of situation is going to affect your attitude as well as behavior. Remember as Dr. House said in the episode "Airborne" "if you're brain thinks you're sick, it makes you sick." Your mind is powerful and can make your body do things impulsively, but one also has to remember that "you are not your thoughts, you are just aware of your thoughts." 

Gratitude Letter

One of the things I admired most about my time at Harvard was the department's commitment to writing "thank you" notes to colleagues at the Thanksgiving holiday. It is probably the only time any one in the department writes hand-written notes, but brief wrist pain is a minor inconvenience for the serotonin that floods your system when you receive all the positive notes from your colleagues. It's special and was something I incorporated at others places I have worked outside of Harvard and I know those colleagues appreciate it. Not sure how I'll continue the trend of writing "thank you" notes this year with COVID, but it is definitely something I will continuing in 2020. 

Volunteering

To say the year 2020 has been a frustrating year would be an understatement. The year has seemingly abided by Murphy's Law - if something could go wrong, it did. But to quote Harvard men's basketball coach, Tommy Amaker, "you have to adapt." We lost sports for a brief period of time. Pro sports came back, but much of the collegiate sporting world has yet to return. It leaves a gaping void to everyone who loves sports and college athletics. However, I turned that into a positive and found an opportunity to help those who are less fortunate by volunteering at the West End House Boys & Girls Club delivering groceries to families of club members who were unable to leave their home for one reason or another. 

Volunteering and giving back not only helps others, but it helps you. You feel a sense of accomplishment and another rush of serotonin when you're doing something good for others. So do something good and volunteer. 

Self-Awareness

The key in life is self-awareness - knowing what you want and what you like. No one can make you happy, only you can do that, which is why it is even more paramount to be your own best friend. When you finally know what you want and what makes you happy, the right people and things will fall into your life.